Most week nights, I watch ‘Neighbours’ during breaks on ‘The Project’. Tonight, when I was watching the show, it occurred to me just how weird I think sexual chemistry actually is when I see it on screen. Is it because I’m asexual of is it just my personality?
Since I was about in Year Ten, I got really into getting meanings out of movies (when I actually watch one from start to finish which isn’t very often any more), music lyrics and TV shows. Maybe that’s why I don’t get ‘on – screen chemistry’. Just to be clear, I’m not talking about people going at it. I’m talking about the tension that characters have in most movies and TV shows. Actually, sometimes, it’s annoying because it’s often so obvious what’s going on. Man, get to it already and get it over with!!
Sometimes, it just reminds me how alienated I felt in my latter years at high school (except for the very last year), and even in my early twenties, how I felt when those topics came up (which luckily wasn’t very often). I don’t stress too much about it. I’m over it. I know why I feel apathetic.
In a strange way, maybe that’s the personal meanings I get out of those shows and movies, and in a way, maybe why I can actually be draw pawn to them – because they cement even further how I identify. It makes it clearer to me that things haven’t changed and aren’t going to any time soon. And I guess I’m becoming OK with that.
To people who identify as asexual, how do you feel when you see chemistry on – screen?