Just watching a Dr. Phil episode about a marriage that went south really badly to divorce, but the ex couple are still living together (unfortunately, I have seen it before at least once). It got me thinking, what is “true love”? If a marriage can go sour to the point that even after divorce, there’s still such hostility.
It made me think, “what is true love”? Does it exist in a romantic/ sexual context? What causes “lovers” to betray each other, cheat on each other, or break out in violence.
Apparently, the concept of “soul mates’ or “kindred spirits” originated from the Buddhist/ Hindu belief of reincarnation. Is there a non – spiritual, scientific explanation? Well, the science behind sexual attraction (and even romantic attraction) is fairly extensive. Certain hormones are said to be responsible for sexual attraction, romantic attraction, bonding and some scientists even suggest that certain hormones makes a partner more likely to cheat.
There’s books, seminars and countless media reports about the ‘secrets” to how make a relationship work, yet, relationships seem to go to hell pretty dramatically.
Nobody is perfect, and there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. There are certain people who are “right” for us, but I don’t think it will always feel “right”. At the end of the day, love, whether romantic or even platonic, is respect for the other, taking away the rose – coloured glasses and looking at reality, being able to live peacefully with the other person and having self – respect. In my opinion, once that goes out the window, the relationship/ friendship is gone.
So, is there such thing as “true love” in a romantic context? My answer is “Yes” and “No”. Yes, if two people are meant to be together, than they’ll both consent to it and live as such. But “No” in the sense that there’s no “perfect” match. Toxic relationships aside, each party has to WANT the relationship to work. And that means sticking at it when good times are (hopefully temporarily) out the window.
I think the PInk song “True Love” does some it up: love is sometimes full of contradictions. You can’t live without each other, but you can’t live without them either, you want to hold them and leave them at the same time…. it’s all a part of it, I guess. But of course, there is a time to say enough is enough.